Playing with my little grey cells

Surat

2004-06-04T02:10:00.000-07:00

"Terlampir adalah foto-foto kedai makan saya. Kalau sempat, silakan mampir...."

"Aku menunggu dan menunggu.....berharap-harap cemas akan keputusan yang akan diberikan Direksi...."

"Selama matahari biru masih bersinar di langit putih, maka hari esok akan selalu cerah..."

"Karirku dimulai sejak 25 tahun yang lalu sebagai sales. lalu diangkat menjadi supervisor 5 tahun kemudian."

Semua cuplikan paragraf itu bukan tentang promosi kedai, atau penggalan puisi cengeng, atau orasi suatu partai apalagi CV seorang karyawan. Tapi semuanya adalah bagian dari beragam surat elektronik (e-mail) dengan topik yang sama, yaitu "Mohon Pamit". Lho kok bisa? Ya kenapa tidak. Setelah dilancarkan proyek Minerva, beberapa karyawan mengirimkan e-mail pamitan yang didistribusi ke seluruh karyawan versi mereka masing-masing.

Surat yang sarat emosi itu kadang menjadi lucu, mengharukan, atau memancing cibiran. Tapi aku menanti email seperti itu untuk hiburan, sambil berpikir-pikir, perlu nggak ya nanti aku kirim email semerti itu ...atau langsung cabut aja? Hhmmmm....

My ADHD son

2004-02-09T18:40:00.000-08:00

He used to be a happy child. Maybe a little more active than most. Maybe a little more argumentative. At first I thought it was just a stage, something he'd grow out of. Sometimes, it was even cute, in a way.

When he was four he went to school and the complaints began. Complaints from the neighbors. Complaints from his schoolmates. Complaints from his teachers.

I went to a psycholog and psychiatry. They said my son needs Ritalin. I was scared to give it to him. The doctor said it was safe. How can such a powerful medicine be safe? But his behavior was so difficult, I had no choice. It seemed to help a little. But still some unanswer question pop up in my grey cells "Am I really curing my son instead of poisoning him?"

Now...here it is a blog I made for him. It's helping me to track what I have done to help my beloved son.

New Year Song

2004-01-08T02:12:00.000-08:00

Tell everybody I'm on my way
New friends and new places to see
With blue skies ahead yes
I'm on my way
And there's nowhere else
that I'd rather be

Tell everybody I'm on my way
And I'm loving every step I take
With the sun beating down yes
I'm on my way
And I can't keep this smile off my face

I thought this song (soundtrack of Brother Bear ) would be my theme song facing the New Year. Actually this song is an anticipated song to cheer me up if Minerva kicks me out of her ship. But I was wrong. Minerva talked to me. She tends to hold me to stay in her ship. Thank to God, who let me have my job in this challenging year.

Today, while I started to find a new theme song, I looked around the ship … find out the ship condition. Gosh……the ship is drowning. Hhhmmm…..maybe I should search the song from Titanic soundtrack.

M i n e r v a

2003-12-17T00:49:00.000-08:00

Minerva, also known as Athena, was the goddess of wisdom in Greek mythology. She was also a warlike divinity; but it was defensive war only that she patronized, and she had no sympathy with Mars's savage love of violence and bloodshed.

There is also Minerva in the company where I work. This Minerva is a code name for a confidential project. People who involve in this project should have a wide wisdom, and talk calmly like the goddess. They have to use their wisdom in a secret “war” they have to win. And like the goddess like, the war is defensive war to anticipate the “bloody thing” happen.

To tell you the truth, my company is in the middle of collapse. To cut some expenses they should cut some employees who have been evaluated not productive enough. The bosses who evaluate and select their employees are in the Minerva project. Do my boss select me to join in the “bye bye”group? I don’t know yet. This week, exactly last week before Christmas, is the time when we are “selected” to be in it or not.

What a nice surprise for celebrating Chirstmas ….

strong vs soft

2003-11-19T03:03:00.000-08:00

When you come into elevator in high-rise office building, you can smell artificial flavor welcoming you in. Sometime it smells like oranges, sometime apple or sometime jasmine. It is sprayed to make the guest smell the freshness. In tropical country like Indonesia, where sun is generously shine all day long, you can easily smell typical tropical armpit odor which belong to somebody in the elevator. So fruity and flowery perfumes are definitely needed. But for some people, including me, that artificial freshness make you get instant headache, or at minimum impact can make you sneeze…hatchiiiii…. Wait till the artificial freshness mix up with armpit odor. Surely I will get both those impact…headache and sneezing.

During this fasting month, there is a different smell in our elevator office. Firstable I think someone carrying pandan wangi rice was in there. My friend had different guessing. She looked curious to a man who come first in the elevator, wear a new perfume smell like kolak (banana steam in coconut milk). She’s ridiculous!
But when it happened the next day and the day after that, and continually happen, I start wondering. What kind of smell is that ? The smell reminds me of something traditional, friendly, relaxing, comfortable, and the important thing is it doesn’t make me sneeze. It is Pandan leave smell (I think). Nice soft smell that can make you feel comfortable, even there is a unique armpit odor beside you. You still can smell the body odor, but in comfortable aura, somehow, I can calmly wait the stink smell disappear so I can smell deeply the pandan leaves again.

Should I be like the pandan fregrance or the fruity fregrance ? Make people get headache or comfort ?

Where do the happiest people in the world live?

2003-11-04T17:42:00.000-08:00

The answer? Nigeria -- with those living in Mexico coming in second. The U.S ranked 16th according to a new study from a London magazine. Why are people in Nigeria and Mexico so happy? Well, according to this particular study, the Nigerian and Mexican cultures emphasize faith and family above all else. This study also found that sometimes those with the least materialistic possessions are actually happier than those who appear to have everything.

Remember, your family first.

Studying again

2003-10-31T02:43:00.000-08:00

Ugh…..Mom give me another math exercise and again asked me to concentrate. What is concentrate anyway ? hhhmmm…..I remember orange juice concentrate daddy brought for us yesterday. It’s too sour for me, but Mom and Dad loves it. Ugh…she is starting to yell, I think I have to say something.
“15 ?”
Oops wrong answer. I hate Mommy when she is yelling like that. She reminds me of Sinchan’s mother, one of my fav Japan cartoon. Yeah right….moreover her new curly hair makes her more look alike. I wonder … is there a horn growing on her head when she get mad like that….or..or…maybe fire come out from her mouth just like sinchan’s mother when she’s getting mad. Hahaha….. that’s really funny if those can really happen to Mom. Yaiks…she is yelling again. That’s mean I have to give another answer.
“10 ?”
ugh…stil a wrong answer. Maybe I should guess bigger number
“30?”
Aaaahh…there she go. She is yelling out loud the answer. Hhhmmm…the answer is 8. It’s look like a simple exercise. Now she write down again another example. When will all this study thing end ????

Huuuuaaaaaahhh…..I really tired. At last Mommy let me go to bed. After I say my prayer, she kiss me on my right cheek “ Good night” and kiss my left cheek “Sleep tide” and the last kiss my forehead “have a nice dream”. I said the same things but no kissing. She looks tired. But I am tired too after schooling, playing all day, and having night lesson like this.
“I love you” she said again before she close the door. Is she need an answer for that ? huuuuaaah I don’t know, I’m….huuuuaaaahhh….too sleepy to think again.

Studying

2003-10-27T02:04:00.000-08:00

“Ok son, please pay attention and think! Remember what I have taught about it to you before. So…..what’s the result again?”
I knew his eyes were not focus on the math exercise I wrote on the whiteboard.
“ 15 ?”
“wrong”
“ 10 ?”
“Don’t guess ! THINK!!!”
“30 ?”
“8!!!!!!!!!! The answer is 8 !!!!”
*sigh* I don’t know what’s the object of my anger. Is it my son or his school? Is he so slow so he can’t solve it or the school curriculum is too high to reach? Is it right that a child in early second grade is given math exercise like below:
If 2 cm = 1 stick length
So 16 cm = …stick length
The child has NOT given how to divide yet. But the exercise needs that skill to solve it.

Teaching a 7 years old boy is not easy. 99.99% of his grey cells always want to play instead of study seriously. And further more my grey cells also send the “need to rest” signal when I get home. Watching TV, having light conversation with family, play with my kids or just cuddling with my hubby, those are what I needed after I get home.

Hiiii ... bloggy

2003-09-25T02:59:00.000-07:00

Wow…it’s been over a month I didn’t update this blog. I miss you bloggy….
In my last hectic weeks it was really tempting for blogging but I couldn’t. I had no idea to write, even if I had it, I had no time to think twice for write it down in English.

Ok now I have my spare time back….
hhhhhmmm...let see…..what should I write……
Uuugh….I have no idea
Uuuuummmmm……
Aha !!!!
Nope!
Uuuuuuuuuummmmm……

Better if I’ll try tomorrow

Feel like browsing?

2003-07-31T02:08:00.000-07:00

Getting bored with my routine job, I checked people blog who just being published in Blogger.
1. “Insert Title Here”. The title look funny. Maybe Gina, the owner, didn’t have any idea what should she put in the title, so she just copied what blogger said so. Gina love to call her Dad “fuckin shovanistic ass” and her mom as “Crazy Lady”. Fiuffff….what a poor child.

2. Cosmicbuzz. The title made me to click it. Suzette, the owner, is a mother of two (like me) who write a blog for her own and also for her children. Each child has its own blog. Her son is still 3 years old and her daughter is 6 months old. She can tell nicely her children daily life in child perspective. There are a lot of adorable photos too here. What a nice blog!

3. Sic Faciunt Omnes. Strange language title made me curious what’s in it. An Indian man who write about politic, economic or else which happen in India. Maybe he writes for Indian community, that’s why I don’t really get what he wrote.

4. Tanobatak. Sound familiar with the title, even it is using strange language too. Yeah I’m right. It’s about Batak, a part of Indonesia culture. And it is sooooo batak (baca: batak skaleeeee )

Yes that’s all for today. GO BACK TO WORK !

What’s happened in the last 2 decades ?

2003-07-23T01:41:00.000-07:00

An Arkansas man who fell into a coma after a car crash 19 years ago has woken up and greeted his family. You can find the full story here. After his wake, that man has a lot of things to catch, things that change when he was in coma. Of course the world has change in the last 2 decades. Let’s take a look at a few things in which the world has changed.

One of the most astonishing things is that the world is controlled by computers. Everything from a kitchen appliance to a car engine now has a tiny chip in it. Internet technology is running very fast in growth, including this weblog thing.

There is a very popular man named Osama Bin Laden. He is so popular that if you ask children in my country their surely knows him. But if you ask who is Tony Blair…..don’t hope to much to get the right answer.

In 1989, the Berlin Wall was breached, so was the wall in my old house in south Jakarta. (No correlation in these 2 facts? Of course they do, at least for me)

Michael Jackson now has a white skin, allover his body! (tell me the tips how you did that Mike…)With no Extraderm, Pond's, Clinic ... taraaaaaa ... suddenly he become white.

There is a deadly disease called HIV/AIDS. One of the victim caused by that disease is Freddy Mercury, a singer in my favorite band, Queen.

19 years ago, I just a teenage with no powder to put on in my cheeks. 8 years later I met a wonderful man. That man become a father of my “always want to know” son and “talk a lot” daughter.

I believe God is behind all the things happened.

An analogy of stupid sad story

2003-07-16T03:32:00.000-07:00

A few months ago, I saw a man sinking in a swamp. Slowly but sure the mud has swalowed his body step by step. The man looked very terrible, so terrible that he couldn’t ask for help. Everybody around the swamp, included me, gave a try to help him. We offered him a stick to grab, but it was too far for him to reach. We threw a rope near him, but seem like he couldn’t move his hand. We thought the mud was pulled him down so tide. So we tried to shake the swamp to make some mud move away from him. But he seemed like positioning himself to sink deeper and deeper.

Day by day pass by. The man is still in the swamp. We give him food, drink and shelter to keep him alive. We all become tired to help him. Our routine jobs sometimes make us forget that the man still sinking.

One day at the side of the swamp, hopelessly I looked him in the eyes, said in silent that I really care about him, but don’t know what to do next to help him. In his tired eyes I saw glimpse that he turn to like living in the swamp. He doesn’t care anymore what people said that living in the swamp is not appropriate, it’s dirty, it’s disgusting…..he really doesn’t care anymore.
Sadly I realize that from the first time when he has just got drowning, he was not unable to give his hand to be helped, but he didn’t want to. He was even not asking for any help.

Until now I can’t stop my tears while remembering him.

Things to remember when I get old

2003-07-06T18:11:00.000-07:00

I used to have daily email from Family First. Since 3 months ago i had unsubscribe from it. But for special email i saved it in my special folder instead of deleted it.

This morning I was searching for this email from Family First in my old folder. It's a rather difficult cause it's been saved in my year 2000 back up data CD ROM. Yes, something was happen so I should remind myself with this mesage again.

Have all your kids flown the coop?
Most parents will one day face an "empty nest." The best way to handle the transition is to start preparing now. If you're married, work on staying close to your spouse ... because eventually - it will be just the two of you. Make sure your life isn't completely focused on your
children. Have your own friends and interests. And finally, when your kids leave, don't make them feel guilty. You can tell them you miss them, but don't burden them with your adjustment struggles. After all, preparing our kids to leave the nest is a big part of what parenting is all about.
Remember, your family first.

About Finding Nemo again

2003-06-29T20:43:00.000-07:00

Marlin the clown fish was afraid to death when the baby turtle is out from powerful undersea current where they ride with. But father turtle, Crush, handled it calmly. He believes that his son knows what to do. What all he did was shout cheerfully to give his child the best support. Luckily his son could do his best effort. He swam with all his strength to go back on their track. Marlin - the over protective father – surprised that only good support needed for the child.
“He is ready to face the world” said Crush
“So..when will you know when he is ready?” asked Marlin
“You never really know it. When he know it, you'll know it ….” replied Crush

Another nice movie from Disney. I think the episode above is the essence of the story. As a mother I don’t agree a hundred percent with Crush. But as a daughter I demand that hundred percent freedom to make my own decision while facing the world. So how about you?

Am I weird?

2003-06-24T03:13:00.000-07:00

(This one is writen after some friends bombarding my emails with story of this kid witch)

It is well known that Harry Potter story make lot of people become maniacs and sometimes a little bit insane. But not with me. It doesn’t attract me at all. I never watch the movie nor read the book.

Not just Harry Potter, I also NOT maniac with The Matrix, The Lord of the Ring, Star Wars or Batman(sometimes I watch this, if there is no other good choice in TV).
Am I become weird if I don’t follow the trend ?

I am not an odd woman. I do love movies. My hubby and I always watch James Bond 007 in theater, especially with Pierce Brosnan as the star ;). We also big fan of TV show Friends and never miss even only1 episode. And all of my family love almost allDisney film.

Actually I’m not weird, I just do not easily get persuade. I am a strong woman (apa seeeh….)

M o n o r a i l

2003-06-18T19:44:00.000-07:00

The most pleasant news I read today is about monorail in Jakarta. Yeah right … Bekasi – Jakarta – Tangerang will be connected by monorail. Even though the realization is for 3 years latter but still it can lightning my dream about not stuck again in traffic jam.

Perhaps it will only take half hours to go to my office. That means I will have enough time to eat breakfast at home, enough time to put on my make up, more time to play with my kid, more time to read morning newspaper…or may be more time to continue my morning sleep (hihihi….I bet my hubby doesn’t agree with this).

Waiting for Godot

2003-06-17T01:11:00.000-07:00

Kriiiiiiing
"This is Grey speaking...."
"Hey do you know about the new issue ??"
"No....what issue?"
"I called you, expecting you know about it"

"I know nothing"
"But The Executives are all here"
"So what?.....may be they just miss each other"
Click!

Kriiiiiiiing
"This is Grey spee......"
"What is going on with this company ?"
"Same like yesterday...why?
"Stupid......something big will happen, and I assume you know it"
"Listen....untill know i dont know anything ok?"
Click!

Kriiiiiiing
"This is Gr....."
"Dont hide any silly issue again from me, Grey. What is it?"
"huh? am I suppose to know anything???" I'm getting mad
"ok.....ok.....but if you know something please call me asap."
"yes madam gossip !"
"don't call me that...."
Click.

I hate this kind of situation. Acctualy I eagerly want to know about the issue itself. My boss only said "just wait.....but prepare for 'the big party' soon". After saying that he take 1 week on leaves. What a boss......
If you know something will happen, you will curious to know what is it, isn't it? The feeling is like nunggu bisul pecah.
Or....like waiting for Godot

Being disturbed with this situation, I thought asking the Executive Secretary would answering the mstery of what happened. Better if i call her now.
"Hello miss....."
"Hey Grey...glad you call. I'm gonna ask you about the issue. What is it?"
"huh?"

and still .....i'm waiting for godot........waiting my bisul pecah

What's a good logo anyway?

2003-06-12T21:43:00.000-07:00

Few days ago, while searching about company logo, I found this site. It’s about good logo from all over the world, and mostly are top brand. Browsing in it makes my grey cells playing with memory of mind about 3 years ago.

3 years ago I became a member of “Defining a new logo” team in my company that I work for. Member of the team are directors and senior managers. I was not director nor senior manager. Actually I was the only junior staff in that team. So…. I became the only opportunity from the down liners, to get sneak information (baca : bocoran) before it legally being informed. Since my career is the bet, no information for them, … at all !!

After 13 months being hectic with argues and fights in the team, the logo delivered. Guess what my colleagues said after the launching
“That’s it ??? just for this design you kept secrets for all the information ??”
That is not the only “punch in the face” I got. Below are some of it:
“It is not a logo is only text”
“The logo is too long. It’s the longest logo ever”
“The color is weird”

Of course I give explanations for every questions. But this site. gives more than just explanations. It also gives proof. There are so many logos that come in text. These are some famous brand as axamples

a n d

And….the important thing is our logo (with 12 characters in it) is not the longest text logo. Compare to this logo:

at least our logo become runner up :p

About the logo's color. For me, the color is cool (I swear this is not self justification...). Believe it or not, for the last 2 years, the color become trendsetter for new corporate logos in my country. We are the pioneer, you know !!! Eventhough, I hate to admit that now the color are being over used.

2003-06-10T19:40:00.000-07:00

Story of Stupidity
a simple analogy of the real sory

One day in pizza restaurant
man A : "What a great meal we just had. Good food, nice place and excellent services"
man B : " Yeah....but I can’t find dendeng balado, rendang and other padangese food here"
man A : "Hahaha...funny!! This is Pizza Restaurant remember ? If you want rendang, just go to Padang Restaurant instead"
man B : "I'm serious! I want padangese food in nice clean place like this and have exactly the same services I got now"
man A : "So.... be creative! Do something to fulfill your want ....."
man B : "I will......of course I will..."

One hot day in front of The House of Restaurant Representative
Man A sees man B among hundreds demonstration participants and become one of them
Man A : "What are you doing here ?"
Man B : "turning my want into result!"
Man A : "What want?"
Man B : "the one that pop up in my head when we were in pizza restaurant..... you know about having rendang in nice cool place. So... I do this. These hundreds people here are with me to force The House of Restaurant Representative to declares a new regulation."
Man A (sweating... and looks stupid, have no idea what kind of regulation is that)
Man B : (continue his explaination) "With this new regulation, after now, every kind of restaurants, including pizza restaurants, should have rendang as one of their menus"
Man A : "WHAT???..... Why don't u just have your own padang restaurant and do benchmarking to learn how pizza restaurant manage and run their restaurant ?"
Man B : "UUmmmm....nooooo....This way is much more fun and simple you know. Soon enough I get what I want"
Man A still sweating and looks more stupid......

Movie of the month

2003-06-05T20:03:00.000-07:00

It is coming to Jakarta in last June
Can not wait to see it !!!

2003-06-01T21:43:00.000-07:00

Stuck in Second Gear

So no one told you life was gonna be this way [four claps]
Your job's a joke, you're broke, your love life's D.O.A.
It's like you're always stuck in second gear
When it hasn't been your day, your week, your month, or even your year, but...

yeah...its lyric of tv show "Friends"
I search this lyrics, coz the melody is energic and can get along with my ears...
But when I read the first paragraph, I found that : hey..... that's me....my career is stuck in second gear....
OK for now : START LOOKING FOR A NEW JOB !!!

2003-05-23T02:58:00.000-07:00

M u s i c

Listen to this music. It is Etude in E, op 10 No. 3 by Frederick Francois Chopin. This music in such a way attracts me. While listening, I imagine a nice smiling lady dancing on the floor smoothly. The picture dramatically change when the music enter the fortissimo part, a louder part then before. I hear a deep sadness in that part.
Sadness ? No ….
May be anger. No….
May be both.
Sadness and anger (I’m listening to this music right now to get the picture clearly). The emotions are wrap by Chopin in a nice beautiful way.

Chopin is one of a great composer. Schumann – a famous composer too – described Chopin’s music as cannon buried in flowers. Wow……

I never get bored listening to this music. One day I listened to it 5 times, playing it over and over again. Until I didn’t realized when my mother came in my room and said “That song was one of your Dad fav….”

What a beautiful sadness……

2003-05-21T19:30:00.000-07:00

B o o k

When I was a teenage, I collected Trio Detective of Alfred Hitchcock. It was not easy to do that coz I didn’t have enough money. I remember one day, mrs. Nyo threw my Trio Detective new book outside my room. Coz I was spending all my birthday gift money from my uncle for that book. For her, is better to spend my money for my school matter rather then a stupid book like that. Sorry Mom, with my gokilness at that time, sometimes I forgot how hard our lives was.
After that I threat my money more carefully. I still went to a big bookstore near my school, and had a dream to buy all of the books I want…someday.

Last week I went to a bookstore. Seeing so many books on the racks become such a great pleasure for me. I can pick whatever book I like and I can buy as many as I want. And my eyes always sparkling look at the book of Agatha Cristie. I chose “The Hollow” only, even my heart want to buy all AC books. Yah…my limit now is time.

2003-05-08T19:36:00.000-07:00

Why English ?

Kenapa juga gue maksain nulis di blog ini pake basa ingris. Udah jelas gramar gue acak adul gitu. Ya kenapa enggak ?Kalo nggak dibiasain nulis inggris malah semakin nggak bisa.
Buat yang bingung bacanya eh ngertinya (bacanya sih gampang), silakan koreksi di kolom comment. Kalo terlalu bingung ngatrinya...ya salah sendiri kenapa juga dipaksain baca....hihihi

2003-05-06T03:38:00.000-07:00

The Blind Beggar vs The Blind Salesman
Choise of being a pity or working hard

Almost in every working day, at the last traffic light on my way home, i always see this blind beggar. He looks clean compare to other beggars. The way he identify the traffic light turn to green to avoid him hit by car, amaze me. He moves away when he hears cars being gas. I knew it, after made a simple experiment (actually ...my hubby did it). When we saw him in 2-3 cars away from our car, my hubby give our car the gas.....and .....quickly he moved to the sideway. A few second later (maybe after mengumpat-ngumpat) he knew his false prediction......
Please forgive us for applying that experiment to you.......

Being common with that blind beggar, made me feel a deep pity when i saw a different blind man at a different traficlight. Firstable we thought he is a beggar. He looks dirty, even his hand has a black colored cause by dirt. But we were wrong. He sells mineral water from door car to other door. Knowing he is selling something instead of begging, make me amaze. Different kind of amazing. My hubby by reflex was going to give some money to him.
"No dear....dont give him money for free, just buy his product will help him a lot".
But the light turned green, before we gave nothing to him.....sighhhh....

You just give me a good lesson...in such a way. Thanks.

2003-04-14T00:31:00.000-07:00

The Grey Cells

Sometimes a simple, not so necessary, silly think - pop up in my grey cells.
But i just dont wanna to talk about it with my beloved in our precious time. Even sometimes i did it.
So here is the place where you can find me playing with my little grey cells.

What is little grey cells anyway....?
You'll know it if you are a big fan of Agatha Cristie....

2003-04-04T01:43:00.000-08:00

Preambul/Mukadimah/Kata pengantar

At last.....I have my own blog
I haven't make a decision yet, what the content will be.
but for sure, u will not find any personal info about me in this blog